Tutorials for 2019

Hi Everyone!

Many thanks to everyone who filled in our survey on bondage and photography tutorials. The survey is now closed and we are setting to work to create new photosets, videos and documentaries to fulfil your requests. I thought you might be interested in knowing the survey results.

First of all, we were very encouraged by the sheer volume of responses. We had 71 in total, of whom 66 people were interested in tutorial materials on RestrainedElegance.com.

This in itself is a huge boost for us- that’s a significant fraction of the membership, something we didn’t really know about before running the survey. It is great to know that people are really interested and it has definitely encouraged us to put significantly more time and energy into the tutorial material on the site this year.

I’ll aim for at least one tutorial feature a month, two if time permits.

Tutorial Subjects

(On this chart 1 = everyone hates the idea, 3 = everyone loves the idea. Sorry for the odd axes, blame Survey Monkey or me for being too cheap to pay for upgraded presentation options).

From this I take away that pretty much everyone is interested in tutorials on bondage ideas, how to tie and bondage techniques.

There’s a strong interest in stills photographic technique, model-related technique (posing, makeup, how to direct a model, etc.) and in post-production.

There’s some interest in video-centric tutorials. For some people that’s their main interest (reinforced by individual comments) but quite a few people are only interested in bondage and still photography.

The least interesting overall was industry-related technique like selling your work, hiring models, etc. but even that had plenty of people who would be very interested if we did do something on this.

Action points:

We will aim to prepare tutorials all of this in due course, since nothing proved absolutely uninteresting to everyone.

We will prioritise bondage technique first, then stills photo technique, then video specific tutorials.

I’ll try to cross-over video technique and stills technique where I can (eg natural light lighting and equipment is useful for both) to broaden the appeal.

It’ll take a while to prepare some of this eg some tutorials require a day’s shooting, where others (eg equipment advice) just needs me to sit at the computer for an afternoon. But thank you that sets our broad agenda for 2019!

Style of Presentation

Slideshows are clearly the least popular. I will continue to put up slideshows where we have given invited talks but will not use them otherwise.

All the other formats have their adherents, but people clearly value a better-constructed tutorial video or behind-the-scenes over a video-log talking head YouTube video style. In some ways that’s sad because talking-head videos are easy to churn out quickly. But I shouldn’t be surprised that RE members would prefer us to do fewer tutorials but make them more comprehensive and better presented!

Annotated stills sets with text are clearly appreciated too, which is nice for me as that’s often the most natural way for me to discuss technical issues like the aperture/depth of field series.

Action Points

A mix of materials is good, so we can choose the format that most suits the subject. Behind the scenes, documentary-style videos and annotated photosets will be the three main formats.

Can the Model sometimes be untied?

We are conscious of course that we are primarily a bondage site, so where we can have the model tied up we will. But sometimes if a technical series is being done with explanations or with us shooting documentary video, that could take a very long time and require her to be bound for longer than is safe or efficient.

For example, the recent Paul McRope/Ariel series. The early technical lessons involved a lot of fiddling around with lens changes and f/stop changes – there was too much going on, and each series took too long to shoot, for me to really be comfortable having Ariel tied up for all of it.

But once we stopped doing the methodical learning exercises with lights and camera in each of six places and were putting it into practice, something more like shooting a normal set, of course we went back to having her in bondage.

So thank you for this, it’s a significant consideration in shooting some of these tutorials. Especially the popular documentary-style videos. It means we can continue to do stuff like the aperture tutorial series and the lighting tutorial series without needing the model to endure potentially two hours or more in bondage.

A few highlights from individual suggestions

Thank you to everyone who contributed suggestions as well as just answering the questions. We’ll try to cover as many of them as we can. I particularly plan to cover:

  • How to achieve sharpness in your photos
  • Shooting on a shoe-string budget
  • Shooting on a camera phone (ironically, I’m not qualified to shoot this one. So it’ll be more of a “photographer challenge” – spend the day shooting with my iPhone, can I get anything worthwhile? I’ll film it and let you know!)
  • A basic all round videography tutorial
  • A basic all round stills tutorial – which I’ll follow up with more advanced videos on sub-topics
  • A basic all round bondage technique tutorial
  • A basic all round bondage safety tutorial
  • A basic all round working with models tutorial
  • How to approach post-production (one for stills, one for video)
  • Using light and shadow to make it seem real
  • Showing emotion
  • Sets, equipment, environment and production design – how do they contribute?
  • The hogtie (multiple requests here!)
  • Posing ideas for models in bondage, especially when the bondage is not so restrictive (eg collared and chained, but quite free to move)
  • Developing mutual understanding with models (suggestion mentioned studios and other photographers, too, but I think there will be less interest in that)
  • Effective shooting methods – which I’m going to take to mean “I have a model booked for a few hours. How do I make sure I get some good shots?”
  • Building up – from full auto to manual on the camera
  • Metal bondage technique
  • Moving from simple floor bondage work to more advanced ties
  • Doing your first bondage shoot
  • Doing your second bondage shoot
  • How to step up your game with some basic extra equipment
  • Progressive ties – ties that can start as one thing and turn into another without untying

That’s already WAAAAY more than a year’s work to cover everything, but I’ll do the best I can!

There are a few things that I will not be covering any time soon. Self bondage – while Ariel does sometimes tie herself up, and models do it on camera with metal bondage, it isn’t our area of expertise, especially since we ALWAYS have other people present when we do it. So I’m not qualified to speak about this I’m afraid.

Suspension – we don’t currently have a safe suspension point in our house/studio, and we’ve always been very cautious with suspensions anyway. So while we could put something together it would need a lot of resources, and I’ve already got my work cut out for me covering the above!

An updated lexicon – I think we can update the pages, but doing a whole extra lexicon shoot is a massive undertaking, so may not happen any time soon.

And Finally… Tutorials in Person

We have a very small number of slots for one-on-one dedicated tutorials this year. Take a look at the sort of thing we laid on for Paul McRope in the recent tutorials with Ariel. If you really want to kick-start your bondage photography or level-up your skills, this is by far the most effective option. We will construct a tutorial program to your individual specification, for one or two days.

We won’t have time to offer small group tutorials this year (although if you wanted to book us for a dedicated tutorial with yourself and a friend or partner we could totally put together a dedicated program for you).

If you are interested email webmaster@restrainedelegance.com. And if you happen to be interested in some of the above topics and are willing to let us use the resulting shots to put together tutorials for RE members as Paul did, we can definitely give you a break on the costs of the tutorial.

If you are interested don’t hang about, as we will likely only be able to fit in two or three people at most as we’ll fit them in around existing RE shoots and Ariel’s modelling, so we’ll need to get dates in the diary SOON.

Please don’t post our stuff to tube sites

I am writing this because there is someone who is an active member right now posting each of our videos onto pirate tube sites as they come up.


It probably won’t make any difference putting this notice up here. But just in case the person doing this doesn’t realise that what they are doing is wrong, I’d just like to go over it once again.

A typical RE video represents AT LEAST a day’s work. Even a 10 minute video takes over an hour to shoot by the time we’ve set up the lights, camera, microphones, the model has repaired her makeup, changed her outfit, we’ve done the typing up and the filming. Then we have to back up the footage, edit it, colour grade it, do an audio pass, export it, transcode it to MP4, upload it, write the storyline to go with it, post it to the shopping cart, queue up a few of tweets about it to let people know it exists, etc..

We get about 5 short video shot in a day. Some longer videos take a full day to shoot, and up to a week to edit.

They represent a LOT of work. And a lot of YOUR money.

Why YOUR money? Because all of this work is bought and paid for by YOUR subscription fees. Several hundred of you kindly club together to join the site, and this is where the money comes from. The money to pay the model – comes from you. The money to buy the camera equipment, lights, bondage gear, hire the location? All comes from you. They money to make it possible for me to live and therefore devote my time to making these videos? Comes from you. The money to get Ariel to help out with the rigging and the editing? Comes from your subscriptions.

So in a way, the person posting our videos on tube sites is stealing from all of us.

Because this whole deal only works if everyone sticks to the bargain. Each of us can have the full fruits of the work we do to make these videos, for a very reasonable price. If you’ve ever ordered a custom video you know how much more expensive they are than a website membership. That’s the power of crowd-funding.

Posting the videos on a tube site is cheating ALL OF US, the people who have paid for the video to be made in order that we can all enjoy it, securely and safely, in high-resolution, on a nicely-built website that doesn’t bombard you with ads or slurp all your personal data against the day when they decide to blackmail you with it (or whatever the end-game business plan of the tube sites actually is). I enjoy my job- it is a privilege to be the one at the sharp end who gets to spend my time creating BDSM erotica. I do it because I love it- I love looking through the stuff you have generously allowed me to have my part in creating!

If fewer people join the site as a result, we will have less money to pool together to do the next shoot. Which means we maybe have to be less ambitious. Shoot faster, churn out an extra video in the day rather than making the ones we shoot the very best they can be. Fewer two model videos. Fewer locations. Lower quality, generally.

A website membership allows you to access content which would have cost a hundred thousand pounds or more to have shot for you as custom commissions. It’s the bargain of the century- Netflix for bondage. Except we are much smaller.

So when we have to pay money to DMCA agents to get the content taken down, it comes from YOUR money and it leads to less money for future shoots. When I have to spend a morning compiling long lists to get it all taken down, that’s time I’m not spending writing scripts or editing or filming. That’s just not efficient!

I’m not trying to make you feel sorry for me here. I’m trying to point out that the asshole who is posting our stuff is stealing time, energy and attention from the core mission of Restrained Elegance- which is to pool our resources to make exceptional, high quality BDSM erotica. I can and I will chase it down and get all this stuff removed, but it is a stupid, unnecessary distraction.


KinkyElephant.com update – invitation only

Hi Everyone

A few months ago I created KinkyElephant.com, a social media “instance” on a network of Federated social media sites called Mastodon. My intention was to provide a space for fetish producers, models, amateur photographers and fans to meet and post which would be safe from shut-down by corporate social media operators like Tumblr and Twitter.

Well, this week Tumblr dropped the news that they were banning all non-work-safe postings. And in the two days since that happened, membership at Kinky Elephant has exploded.

In one way this is great. But I’m paying for KinkyElephant’s hosting out of my own pocket, and the numbers risk overwhelming the server. I don’t mind paying some of what is effectively YOUR money from RestrainedElegance.com and SilkSoles.com purchases to provide a social space for us, but I can’t afford to take over the whole of sexual Tumblr as a public service.

I’m upgrading the hosting plan for the instance, but I’ve had to temporarily suspend public sign-ups for the service whilst we decide what to do.

What I would like to do is to revert to the original plan of providing a space for bondage and kinky people to post. Everyone can follow what we post from other instances – for example, from Mastodon.social or Switter.at which are bigger, publicly-funded instances.

But for the actual membership of KinkyElephant.com I may restrict it to Bondage industry types, models, amateur bondage photographers, and fans who are customers of RestrainedElegance.com, SilkSoles.com, or have bought from our eStores etc..

If you would like to join in, please contact me and I will issue you an invitation so you can join while public signups are closed!

All the best, a still very-post-viral Hywel

Tutorials Survey for 2019

Hi Everyone!

When I was starting out, I was greatly helped by bondage producers and models sharing their expertise online. Our tutorials are a way of paying that back.

But what topics should we cover? What is the best way of presenting it? Are you even interested at all?

I’ve put together a quick (3 minute) survey to help me plan our tutorials for 2019 and I’d really love to know what you think!

Take the Bondage Tutorial Survey here

Thank you!

UPDATE: 503 errors (service temporarily unavailable)


Apologies if you tried to access the site earlier this week and got a 503 (Service Temporarily Unavailable) error. This was due to timeouts in our web host/payment processor’s security scripts, exacerbated by a couple of inefficiently-coded helper functions on our own part of the site. As it was an intermittent error it took several days (and in my case more-or-less sleepless nights) to track down and fix.

To make it up to you, there will be bonus new updates between Xmas and New Year, plus at least THREE archive sets a day for all of December!

Cheers, Hywel


UPDATE 16/11/2018: This morning’s error log looks MUCH more hopeful. If you continue to have problems accessing the site please let me know. But it looks like yesterday’s changes have fixed it.

UPDATE 15/11/2018: OK we have tracked down two or three code errors which may have been consuming a lot of server CPU, and we’ve increased several settings which should give more headroom before declaring a timeout. Also taken several measures to improve efficiency and cache a few more pages which were database-access-heavy to help reduce load on the server.

The error rate has decreased significantly, and although I’ve seen a couple of timeout errors in the last hour or so it isn’t the pages full that we’ve had for the last few days. If you get the problem again persistently, please could you let me know? I’m going to leave the site running as-is overnight again and assess the apparent error rate in the morning to see if this has made a significant impact.

In parallel, I have been processing all of December’s updates and I promise to make up for the unacceptable poor service in the last few days with a bunch of bonus updates for the Xmas season! Apologies again!


UPDATE 4: Last update for today. Have I mentioned how much I hate trying to chase down intermittent problems? Tech support have made some changes to the security scripts and things now appear to be running more smoothly, so I am going to go to bed and see how the site survives the night. At least we should get a cleaner error log tomorrow if the problems recur.

Apologies again for the very poor service over the last few days. I will make it up to you with lots of bonus updates in December! 🙁


The whole site is currently giving the 503 error. Whatever is causing it, it doesn’t seem like it was the code I was playing with. On the plus side, that’s eliminated all the other spurious warnings and errors from the error logs, so maybe tech support will find it easier to track down the problem now. Apologies, be back up as soon as we can 🙁 🙁

UPDATE 2: 14th November evening

OK, so I’ve found and fixed a couple of runaway function calls which were using a lot of server resources. The error logs are much quieter since I made that change. Let’s see if that’s properly fixed it.

UPDATE: 14th November

We are having strange intermittent problems following the server outage. The main symptom seems to be a 503 error message (“Service Temporarily Unavailable”) when trying to access the members’ area. The public pages seem to be working fine, and the members’ area works some of the time. But at other times it will give the 503 error when you try to access it. There are a bunch of error messages in the logs and it looks as though something is failing to terminate properly, using up a lot of server resources, and when the server load gets too much, triggers the 503 errors.

I am working on it along with my developer friend and the tech support people at our web hosts. We can’t quite understand why it has suddenly started happening as nothing on our side of the site has changed recently; it might be a security update patch or something has caused a problem with depreciated PHP-database calls.

I’m very sorry for the spotty service- intermittent problems are a bastard to find and fix. We just need to detective-hunt every warning in the log files and run some experiments to figure out where the “first cause” is – what process is it that is using a bunch of resources and not terminating properly? Then triggering a cascade of 503 errors. Please rest assured that we are working as hard as we can to fix!!! Many apologies.



RestrainedElegance.com was offline briefly yesterday because of a database access issue. We’ve solved the immediate problems but are still getting a bunch of warning flags in the log files so we are chasing down the cause. The site is running “at risk” until we’ve figured out exactly what the issue is- we may need to reboot the server again to apply fixes. We will keep the disruption to a minimum, please bear with us.

Thanks, and apologies- we’ll be back to smooth running as soon as possible.