I posted last week about being super-excited about going back to www.northernspanking.com for my second shoot. How right I was to be excited; I wish I’d worked with them when I first started doing spanking work, it’s like being in a big, strange, happy, kinky family.

And how great was my joy not to be in charge! (It was VERY great, to give you a clue…) I woke up on Saturday morning and spent a lovely long time doing my face and hair, before trundling into the kitchen to be fed breakfast. So, pretty much like being a teenager again, really, but without the anxiety… As always, there were lots of people milling around doing important things, but I just ate toast and thought ‘mmm; I’m going to be spanked, ALL day, and I’m going to be told what the stories are, and who I’m meant to be, and even what PANTS to wear, and HOORAY for Lucy McLean et al….’

Over the next two days, we shot and shot and shot, but these were my favourite bits….

1) Trying to maintain a vaguely Russian accent while being spanked for, like, an HOUR.
2) Crying and crying and crying over something I hadn’t actually done, but which seemed entirely real at the time. (Hooray, super director…)
3) Being utterly vile for 40 glorious, spoilt, continuous, Amelia-Jane minutes and pretending to faint to avoid being spanked by my tutor.
4) Whee, working with Stephen Lewis, who really should get spotted by a casting director one day…
5)Oh, gush, gush, gush. It was all lovely. And I got spanked in the bath. And the water was PINK.

And then I flew happily home, having had a wonderful, spank-filled time with lots of lovely people, and feeling excited about seeing the finished product. Hooray for being a model, and not a producer! Can’t recommend it enough.

Amelia-Jane

This was my (entirely true) postive post about being a spanking model. Next, I shall write about the joys of being a bondage model. This might have to be made up. La la la…..

Hmmm, this is something I’ve thought about for a long time. And hoorah, I’ve got a blog so I can go on and on and on about it.

Since I’ve been a teenager, I’ve noticed a tendency in myself to enjoy life’s dramas, especially if I’m the victim of bad circumstances or (even better) bad people. It’s not that I enjoy having horrible things happen to me, it’s just that I kind of (oh, lordy) enjoy the feeling of being rescued from the situation. Mmmm, especially by big strong men. And you need bad stuff to happen before you can BE rescued.

Now, this is all very dysfunctional, and I realised it wasn’t very attractive, so I’ve really tried to stop WALLOWING when things go wrong. I thought it was just me; but when I started meeting other people in the BDSM scene, I realised there’s quite a tendency in submissive girls (and maybe boys too) to relish being a victim. I noticed it so often that I started calling it (to myself) Cinderella Syndrome.

I think it’s basically this; believing that, like Cinderella, your everyday misfortunes somehow make you more desirable to everyone else. And that everyone will want to know all about everything that goes wrong in your life, because it’s actually terribly attractive to be a martyr. And that you don’t need to take responsibility for making things better, you just need to wait to be rescued (like Cinderella by the prince). Now, it’s very fun to be a victim in a scene, but when it spills over into real life, I’m worried that it might be a bit tedious.

Alas, just when I was feeling all EVOLVED, and as though I’m now immune to self-pity, the BDM (huh) pointed out that so far my blog has included;-

A post on how awful my flu is.
Another post about my flu.
A post about how much I hated being in charge of a shoot.
And…. a post about losing my diary.

And then he suggested that perhaps I might be suffering from a little bit of Cinderella Syndrome. Which seems a bit unfair, because he only even knows it EXISTS because I made up a word for it 🙂 So I’m going to spend the week writing upbeat, happy posts about things I’ve enjoyed doing recently. Of which there are many, but I didn’t want to show off.

And from now on, if I post gratuitously about how awful everything is, everyone is allowed to ignore me and/or call me Cinderella.

Amelia-Jane xx

Wheee! I’m off to shoot with www.northernspanking.com later today, and I’m so excited 🙂 This is why I know I’m happier being a spanking model than a spanking producer – it’s a lovely feeling, just having to turn up and act, really just like going to a friend’s house to play, which I did a lot when I was a child. Here is a list of my favourite games which my sister and I made up;-

Witches’ boarding school (hmmm, very much like Harry Potter, but we made it up first…)

Second World War (which involved us being very hungry evacuees and talking about powdered egg a lot)

Poorhouse (mmm, this involved us being horribly abused orphans, and eating crusts of bread)

WORKhouse (even worse than Poorhouse, we had to pull a plough, and had to collapse a lot from exhaustion. My sister didn’t enjoy this game very much, but it was my favourite and I was always pestering to play it…)

Bomb. We had a lamp-post outside our house which ticked fabulously. We pretended it was a bomb, and took it in turns to tie each other to it, after which we had to escape. I was EXCELLENT at this game 🙂

So spanking shoots are really very similar to what I used to do just for fun. Except that there’s actual spanking now, as opposed to imaginary cruelty. And it’s my job. Hooray!

Now I must go and pack, so I shall post more when I’m home on Sunday. EXCITED!

I am properly ill, it turns out. And how lovely that I’ve got a blog, otherwise I wouldn’t have anywhere public to make a big fuss about the symptoms. I had a shoot yesterday which I couldn’t cancel, and must have infuriated the makeup artist by blowing my nose and wiping off the makeup over and over again. She was very patient, and kept re-coating my nose in extra-thick foundation to hide the neon-glow…. And then she basically painted a whole different face on top of my one, and I looked fine in the pictures. Miraculous really – she even had something to stop my eyes being blood-shot. Have never modelled with flu before, am amazed how much a makeup artist can do to hide the evidence. We should all have one…

Is interesting that in bondage and spanking work, hardly anyone ever bothers with them. Gags tend to destroy makeup so I suppose it’d feel like a bit of a waste – and I’ve always been fascinated by what my hair does when I get spanked. It sort of re-arranges itself on my head and weaves itself into a weird kind of mat that sticks straight up. Which would be a total waste of anyone’s hard styling work. I’d really love to have a stylist who’d ensure that I ended a spanking with my hair behaving like a lovely, shiny waterfall. Huh. And without my makeup smeared on the sofa.

I can’t cope with being actually upright any more, so am going to lie down and drink some more Lucozade, which I’m heartily sick of now. I’m wishing that I belonged in an old fashioned girls’ school story (not for the first time…) and that I could be sent off to a sanatorium to recover from my long, serious illness….

‘No!’ Cried Amelia-Jane, ‘I simply must stay here and help the Upper IV to victory in the netball match against those beasts in Lower VB!’

The easy tears of someone who is not very well spilled down her pale cheeks, and Miss Newton knew that poor Amelia-Jane would not be playing netball again for some time. ‘My dear, you’ve had a fearful illness, and added to that awful shock for you and Flynn last term, you’re thoroughily exhausted. You’ll need a good rest before you can come back to school – so we’ll send you somewhere with good doctors who can make you well again’…..

Ahhhhhhhh 🙂