Oooh golly, it’s so tricky though… correct submissiveness vs correct use of the English language… Can I bear to be partly responsible for the fuzzy-wuzzy, ‘use punctuation however you like’ grammatical slide that English seems currently to be going through? It seems I actually can’t. Capital ‘M’ in the middle of a sentence? Small ‘i’ as a pronoun? Ohhhh God, I can’t. Horrible horrible horrible. It’d be like admitting to being a bit stupid. And while I’m all for a bit of humiliation, that seems a step too far. Actually, I just typed that as ‘that seems a step to far’ by mistake and shuddered at myself.

Hmmm, and also, using a capital ‘M’ for master feels a bit as though I think everyone else should think Hywel’s their master. Which he isn’t. Whereas God is everyone’s god, if you believe in him at all. Maybe. Or maybe let’s not go down a theological argument, that might be a bit stressful, and possibly not all that sexy.

I’ve always felt a bit uncomfortable and squirmy, actually, when I’ve met someone at a party who introduces themselves as ‘Master’ something. It’s not helped by the fact that they always seem to have chosen an absolutely MENTAL name, like ‘Master Thunder’, ‘Master Devil’ or ‘Master’ bloody ‘GRAHAM’, for heaven’s sake. And I just don’t feel as though I can call them that so I end up sloping off, or spending the rest of the evening just calling them ‘you’. Cos you’re not a master unless someone’s chosen to call you that, surely? In which case, maybe it should just be between those of you actually enjoying that particular intimate, BDSM relationship then? Introducing yourself like that feels to me a bit like introducing yourself to a stranger as ‘Darling/Sweetie/Sweetheart/Love/Popkins/Punkin/Teddy’ or similar. TMI, I think!

Ohhh, but now I’m feeling a bit of crushing guilt for having jolly well let the side down regarding my submissiveness. Tricky! I’d be interested to know what everyone else thinks! I’d better stop now 🙂

Golly, thank you so much everyone, and I’m sorry that we’ve not been faster to announce it on the forum ourselves (ChrisUK is the winner!)

I’m awfully happy, and was intending to read out bits of past forum posts as evidence of our mega romance at the wedding reception for part of my speech. But Hywel said I wasn’t allowed.

I really hope we can do an RE shoot in my wedding dress though!

Hooray, really excited about 2012, and I hope that we can make it a great, satisfying, bondage year.

Best wishes everyone!

Ariel x

Thanks very much, Bismark. I really hope that people like it; this was my project and I really hope I did a good job of a damsel-in-distress storyline.

Actually, it wasn’t until ‘Haunted’ had gone up for sale that I started wondering what other people would primarily look for in a damsel-in-distress story. Of course, I know that everyone’s tastes differ, but the things I thought were important are probably the following;-

1) Proper, realistic, energetic struggling

2) Enough set up so that you know something about the girl/girls involved, and have an opinion about them

3) Gags! They just seem to go with DiD stories

4) Rope, tape or cable ties feel more appropriate than metal. I don’t know why

5) A scary/evil perpetrator who the damsel-in-distress really, really wants to get away from.

I’d love to know other people’s thoughts if you feel like sharing?

I

I’m sorry about that; is this in stills or in video? In the stills sets, we occasionally do put in shots with members of crew visible. One reason we do this is that we think some people might like to see behind-the-scenes style shots so we give you the option to look at them.

Normally, if someone’s in the shot for either stills or video it’s because they’re doing something that’s important to the picture (like being mid-way through putting on a gag). So, for that shot to be possible at all, they simply might need to be in it to some extent.

I’ve taken over rigging for almost all the sets that need on-screen interaction, and Kate rigs on location shoots too, so girls are rigging for the site whenever its possible. Unfortunately, most models don’t rig (its not one of the skills most professional models would need very often) and more often than not there’s only one model on set at any one time; she’s the one tied up though!

Hope that’s some help – do point me in the direction of any specific sets or videos if I haven’t answered your question successfully and we’ll have a look at whether they could be shot differently?

Hi David,

Thanks for your kind words! If you haven’t already, maybe have a look at the ‘Sword and Sandals’ videos – its a series of 4, in the archives at the moment. I wrote it cos I love Roman slaves too 🙂 Hope you maybe like the videos.

That’s not to say we shouldn’t shoot more lovely Roman stuff though – if you have any specific ideas for how the girls should be dressed, do post a couple of pictures if you feel like it.

Thanks again,

Ariel x

Ohhh God, I hadn’t heard that it was bondage that poor Bob Dowler’s ‘interest in pornography’ related to.

Bloody hell; for those of you who aren’t in the UK, Bob Dowler is the father of a teenage girl who was murdered a few years ago. The murderer has been convicted and sentenced, but during the trial, Mr Dowler, as a witness, faced prolonged questioning (so did his wife) about whether their daughter had been unhappy at home. His interest in pornography was cited as one of the things that might have contributed to this.

(Apologies for any inaccuracies in this summary, that’s my understanding of what happened based on news reports).

How absolutely miserable that an interest in bondage could be used against someone like that. I guess we’re all used to seeing people accused of violent crimes having any interest in bondage used as part of the case against them. But against a witness? I imagine explaining in court what Hywel and I do sometimes, and while I hope we never need to, I also hope we’d be able to do a good job of explaining the separation that exists (for us, and for other sane people) between what we do for fun and in fantasy, and the way we conduct our relationship with each other, and with the rest of society.

I’ve thought for a long time, for example, about perceptions of rape fantasy by wider society. If you’re a man (or a dominant of either gender) and you admit to fantasising about rape, you might well be seen as potentially dangerous by the non-kinky community. A woman/sub who fantasises about being raped, isn’t generally seen as a danger to herself as far as I’m aware; there seems to be a general understanding that this type of fantasy won’t result in the woman in question deliberately putting herself in danger, wandering the streets and hoping to be assaulted. As a sub, I feel as though the general public is likely to be quite sympathetic to my desires, and not see me as dangerous – either to myself or to anyone else. But my dominant partner might be more likely to be viewed as a potential rapist/murderer/abuser. So I hope that gradually the non-kinky community will understand that sane dominants/sadists want sane submissives/masochists to play with. They’re not looking to re-enact their fantasies with random, non-kinky strangers. And our site is for sane people who understand the difference.

But I don’t know whether I’d be able to persuade a prejudiced journalist of the difference. They’d probably just think I’d got Stockholm Syndrome 😉

Ohhhh God, I just watched the finished video; well done Kate, it’s so funny. I hope some people enjoy the struggling – loony though it is, it’s pretty energetic and it really does look like an escape attempt! My favourite is when they try to ‘roll like a sausage’ and Janey lands facedown on the cookery book….

Sorry, this is only tangential really, in reply to Martes 🙂

I think hair hogties are tougher than normal ones, for pretty much the reason you said. In a normal hogtie, most of the stress is on lower back (for me, anyway) and chest (lots of people struggle a bit with breathing after a while if they can’t roll over onto their side). With a hair hogtie, those two stresses remain, but you can’t rest your head on the floor unless you roll onto your side, and your neck starts to complain after a while about not being able to bend forwards. I’m not complaining though, I still liked it 🙂

I hope I’ve answered your question; let me know if not!

Oh, lovely! I particularly love No Evil and Abduction by Kidnapper. Thank you for sharing your super ideas, we’ll print them out and put them in the ideas folder 🙂

Thanks again,

Ariel 🙂

I’m glad you think so, Hasler! I wore my collar especially 🙂

Thanks Jeff for your continuing support, I’m so glad that there’s lots of stuff that you like here (LOL, me too!)

I love the set with Sammie in the red dress too, and I like the look of Chloe James with the letters in her mouth. She’s got such a beautiful, expressive face I think 🙂

And I’m very happy that Restrained Elegance exists 10 years on!

Hi Darryl,

I really hope that you enjoy them! It was a very memorable shoot for me 🙂

Hello! Thanks for your thoughtful post, and I’m sorry about the delayed response; I’ve been working away from home and Hywel has been Mr Busy 🙂

Your ideas are very useful, and lots of them sound like things we can incorporate into shoots. I think your ideas about specific shots are particularly useful – it’s easy to shoot some of the particular closeups/angles you prefer during the shooting of a set, so its very helpful to have input from Members about what their favourite shots are. The only limiting factor for your requests may be that we mostly work with models who prefer not to do sexually explicit work (and indeed some models who prefer not to appear on sites where other models are shown in very explicit poses). Therefore genital shots, particularly closeups, are the exception rather than the rule on Restrained Elegance.

Happily, everyone’s happy with foot closeups though! And your ideas for poses involving feet sound beautiful.

Thank you for your thoughts, and I hope we can continue to produce images that you like 🙂

Thank you very much, I’m very glad you liked the set because it was my (slightly loony) idea to have a rope gag and blindfold. I was worried it might look a bit too strange for anyone to like 🙂

I’m always happy to shoot more reverse prayers – I love them. I wonder if we shoot another one soon, whether you’ve got a preference for leg position? I’d like to try something other than frogtie or crossed legs this time – so let me know if you have any ideas!

We just shot our first tutorial yesterday. Ahhh, it was super fun, Hywel and I had a go at co-presenting, and I felt like Holly Willoughby on ‘Dancing on Ice’ (sorry to non UK people; Holly Willoughby co-presents one of the UK’s prime time TV shows, but hardly gets to speak at all for some reason. I assume it’s because Philip Schofield is secretly in charge of the world.)

I hope it’ll be useful when it arrives on the site; from watching bits of it back, it definitely seems easier to follow than trying to learn from still photographs in a book.

Hello Lionofthenorth; I wonder if any of the chest harnesses that tie exclusively above the breast (but below the armpits) would work? I’ll see if I can find a picture of what I mean 🙂